Dreaming With Your Spouse

Let’s try something a little different today. Let’s forget all about our debt and financial mess for just a second. If you are married or are in a long-term relationship, today is a great day to start dreaming with your spouse!

TAKE A NIGHT OFF FROM THE GRINDGrind Dreaming With Your Spouse

When you are in the battle to become debt free it’s really easy to get caught up in the details of the budget, working countless hours of overtime, and trying to find ways to save money. But If all you ever focus on is the battle and your huge pile of debt it will get very boring in a hurry! Not just for you, but for your partner also.

However, if you take the time to dream, it not only gives you a break from the monotonous grind, but it gives you a fresh perspective and keeps you mindful of what you are really fighting for, to begin with!

HAVE A DATE NIGHTDate Night Dreaming With Your Spouse

With this being Valentines Day, chances are you are taking some time either today or maybe later on this week to have some 1 on 1 time with your partner. You’ll most likely either be going out to dinner, perhaps a movie, or have some other romantic event planned. Maybe even having a nice dinner at home.

Cooking for your spouse can be a huge money saver and you can have a lot of fun if you do it together!

But instead of talking about the same old boring stuff, (the weather, the kids, work, etc.) you should spice your conversation up and have a dream session!

AS TIME GOES ON, YOUR DREAMS CHANGE

Even if you have done so in the past this can be a great way to have a rewarding conversation. Dreams change, especially when you’ve made some of your past dreams a reality! Maybe you already have a great career, the perfect home, and/or the desired number of kids. Does that mean you stop dreaming about the future? Of course not! If we did, life wouldn’t be very much fun after we’ve achieved “success” now would it?

CONVERSATION TIPS

1. TALK ABOUT YOUR DREAMS

Open up the conversation by talking about your own dreams. It’s important that your partner knows what they are and that you communicate them effectively. It will get them excited and when you open up to them it gives them the opportunity to see how they can help make them a reality with you.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve celebrated with my wife when she finally accomplished whatever dream she was after. I’ve always tried hard to be as supportive as possible and I try to offer any help I can along the way. It’s a very rewarding time for the both of you!

2. LET YOUR SPOUSE TALK ABOUT HIS/HER DREAMS

After you’ve had your turn it’s important to let your partner share his/her dreams as well.

Sit back. Take it all in. Listen. Don’t interrupt. Sometimes it’s easy to want to interject or expound upon your own ideas or even jump back to talking about your dreams again!

Let them have the floor and whatever you do, DON’T be judgmental! They are opening their heart to you and are looking for your support and acceptance.

Remember: This is a DREAM session! Get crazy with it, have fun with it, and come up with some new ideas together! There is no such thing as a dream that’s too big or too farfetched. You just need to figure out how to make it a reality.

Stop saying, “I wish…” Start asking, “How can we…?”

3. WRITE THEM DOWN, DATE IT, REVISIT THEM FREQUENTLY

You don’t need to do this during the actual conversation. But make sure you write these dreams down and keep them where you can both see them regularly. Keep another copy with your budget. It will help you stay motivated and keep your drive going to succeed with your finances.

Make sure you put it a date on it.

This can be a huge success story when you look back and say “Remember when you said you wanted to do that? It was only a short time ago!”

“BUT, I DON’T KNOW IF I EVEN HAVE ANY DREAMS”

Here are a few things to help get your thought process going:

  • Vacation: Where is the one place in the world you’ve always wanted to go? If money was no object where would you like to visit?
  • Home: What does your perfect house look like? Would you move out of state if you had the money? If you could live anywhere in the world where would you live?
  • Car: Have you always wanted a Cadillac? Maybe something wild like a Ferrari? Would you like to rebuild a classic muscle car?
  • Kids: Do you wish you had more children? Maybe wish you had the opportunity to work from home and have more time to spend with the ones you have?
  • Career: Are you happy doing what you are doing? Or would you be happier doing something else?
  • Hobbies: Ever wish you had the money to be able to collect something or start working on something new?

Get the idea? It doesn’t have to be ANY of these. Or it could be all of them. Those are just a couple of ideas right off the top of my head to get you thinking.

My wife and I are always dreaming and talking about the future. It keeps us motivated and pushing forward to make it our reality!

I love this quote that I found on BrainyQuote:

“This is love: to fly toward a secret sky, to cause a hundred veils to fall each moment. First to let go of life. Finally, to take a step without feet.” ~Rumi~

What’s your secret sky? Let go and make it count! Take that first step…together!

I’d love to hear your thoughts/comments below!

 

4 thoughts on “Dreaming With Your Spouse

  1. Brandon says:

    I’m loving your website so far, and this article has just topped that up! I highly agree with all these tips, however I like how you mentioned a break. Taking a break from the daily grind is really important; not just for overall health, but it will help you stay motivated for the long run. I also like how you mentioned writing down your goals, which is probably ONE OF the best ways to reach your goals since you know what you are working towards.

    Cheers,
    Brandon

    • Absolutely Brandon! Thanks for the feedback! The stress of the daily grind can definitely take a toll on our physical and mental health. When staring at our pile of bills it can cause lots of anxiety and dread. But when you go into the battle it’s really easy to only focus on the battle and never take the time to breathe. I’ve been there. Some of my “vacations” have been me worrying about how much it was going to cost me and I never fully enjoyed them. Even when we were being as frugal as possible. As I get older I’m realizing more and more how critical it is to write down your goals…and especially your dreams!

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